Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Homemaker

The most important thing you need to know about the below photo is that it is completely unstaged. It occurred when I happened to glance next to my laptop, only to discover that I am apparently taking full advantage of all modern liberties. Behold:


An empty wine glass and an empty Diet Coke with Lime bottle; both recently full. An empty mini-tub of ice cream, full less than a half hour ago. The evidence that I remained unsatisfied by the ice cream, and looked for the only high sugar alternatives in the house, settling on peanut butter and chocolate sauce. Yes, I squeezed the last of the chocolate sauce into the last of the peanut butter and ate it with a spoon. I value my freedom to do so, and take pride in exercising my rights.

The book I should be reviewing right now is obscured by the envelope that my last reviewing check came in. This might almost be professional if Will hadn't used the envelope to fulfill my request for a half-Ralph-Wiggum-half-Santa's-Little-Helper drawing. The drawing is extremely accurate, and is definitely worth more than the check the envelope once held. Here's a close-up:


Of course, modern liberty includes my scattered birth control pills, antibiotics and purple post-it-notes. It also includes two movies that I a) own and b) have watched recently: Conan (both Barbarian and Destroyer) and Ghostbusters 2. I could not get The Room into the frame, but it is also a movie I own, have watched recently and is lying on my desk.

You'll note the only cleaning agent in view is iKlear for my MacBook screen. Next to that: my tacky non-prescription fashion glasses, which I wear if I know I'm about to meet somebody that I want to impress.

I don't know why there is a screwdriver on my desk.

Despite all these clear indicators that I am allergic to resisting random impulses, I think my favourite part is the hair elastic. Because if it wasn't metaphorically clear enough here that I like to "let my hair down" as it were, I managed to shoehorn something pretty literal in there.

I'm proud to be living the life my 5-year-old self would've wanted.

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